While getting your newborn a passport may seem daunting, in reality, it’s quite easy for passports for most countries in the world. What is essential is getting all documents and paperwork in order (births in Hong Kong have to be registered within 42 days of delivery). Sit back and relax as we help you navigate through the process of applying for your newborn baby’s first passport in Hong Kong.

Sassy Mama Tip 1: The most tiresome process can often be getting the baby’s passport photo as photography shops can be quite inflexible when it comes to changing angles to accommodate a baby unable to hold his or her head up. So parents can bring a white bed sheet to cover their hands while supporting their baby for the photograph.

Sassy Mama Tip 2: Another tip is to get forms beforehand and fill in everything while leaving details of the baby’s name, gender, date of birth, etc. blank. That way, you save time when you are tired and stressed after the birth of the baby.

Here’s how to get a passport for your baby for the following countries:
Hong Kong
Australia
Canada
France
India
UK
USA

Read More: New Dad Survival Guide: Tips From A Proud New Father

Hong Kong Passport

Is my child eligible for a Hong Kong passport?

If your child is a Chinese citizen, a permanent resident of the HKSAR, and a holder of a valid Hong Kong permanent identity card (see these FAQs to learn more) then they will be eligible for a Hong Kong passport.

What is the application process?

As with everything in Hong Kong, the government here has made applying for and getting a baby’s passport super easy. All you need is to fill out a simple 2-page ID 842 form. You can obtain the application forms by calling 2824 6111, sending an email to enquiry@immd.gov.hk or visiting any Immigration Office in Hong Kong. If your child does not have a permanent identity card, as is the case for a newborn, an additional ROP 3 form is needed.

To apply in person (with original documents), you can make an appointment online. You can also apply by post or drop-in (with photocopied documents), but this may extend the process by 2 to 3 working days. Within 14 working days, you can go back and collect your baby’s passport or even allow a representative to pick it up through a signed authorisation (ID 678).

What do I need to bring to my appointment?

If your child already has a permanent identity card:

• The completed ID 842 form
• The child’s Hong Kong permanent identity card
• One recent colour photograph on a white background (40mm X 50mm), see photograph requirements here.
• Consenting parent or legal guardian’s Hong Kong identity card or valid travel document
• The child’s birth certificate with the consenting parent’s name, or a court order for proof of the consenting legal guardian’s custodial rights
• Application fee ($185 for 32 pages or $230 for 48 pages) to be paid via EPS, cash, or credit. If you are posting the documents, you should enclose a cheque
• One other document with proof of identity or a Form for Countersignature (ID 641) with a copy of the counter-signer’s ID card or valid travel document.

If your child does not yet have a Hong Kong permanent identity card:

• The completed ID 842 form
• Completed application form for a Hong Kong permanent identity card (ROP 3)
• Document supporting the child’s right of abode (a Hong Kong birth certificate showing permanent residence status is sufficient)
• The child’s birth certificate with the consenting parent’s name, or a court order for proof of the consenting legal guardian’s custodial rights
• Two identical recent colour photographs on a white background (40mm X 50mm)
• Consenting parent’s Hong Kong identity card or valid travel document
• Application fee (same as above). ($185 for 32 pages or $230 for 48 pages) to be paid via EPS, cash, or credit. If you are posting the documents, you should enclose a cheque
• Plus one other document with proof of identity or a Form for Countersignature (ID 1641) with a copy of the counter-signers identifying document

If you need a quick guide to filling out the forms, look here.

Read More: How To Prepare Your Child For Your Baby’s Arrival

Australian Passport

Is my child eligible for an Australian passport?

If either you or your partner is an Australian citizen, your child is eligible for an Australian passport. 

What is the application process?

You’ll first need to apply for Australian Citizenship by descent (this takes around one month), and you’ll need your child’s original Hong Kong birth certificate in order to apply. Once you’ve got those, you need to make a visit to the Australian Consulate-General over in Wan Chai to hand in your forms in person (thankfully, your baby can stay home!). Luckily, there are convenient times for lodging applications, from Monday through Friday, 9am to 4pm but you must be sure to book in advance. In about 15 business days, you can go back and pick up your bub’s passport.

Sassy Mama Tip: When the system works smoothly, the entire process of obtaining an Australian passport takes about six to eight weeks so don’t plan any trip before your baby is two months old just to be on the safe side. There were lengthy delays during the pandemic so check with the consulate when you submit your forms on the current wait times.

A passport – the application form for minors can be found at Passports Online (and must be filled online as you cannot download a blank form) or you can pick up blank forms in person from the consulate.

To complete the passport application form, both parents with parental responsibility for the child must give consent on the form, and the consent signing must be witnessed. This can be done at the Consulate-General for an additional fee. The consulate will call both parents to check consent.

What do I need to bring to my appointment?

• The completed Australian passport Overseas Application form
• Application fee (the equivalent of AUD 164 in HKD, approximately $860), not including any additional Consular Fees, if needed. Only HKD is accepted, and this can be paid by credit card or EPS. This fee is adjusted regularly, so be sure to check out the fee table before you go.
• The child’s proof of Australian citizenship
• Your proof of identity with your photo and signature. Your own Australian passport is best.
• Lodging parent’s proof of address
• Original birth certificate (with the names of both parents)
• Two colour photographs (35 to 40mm X 45 to 50mm, check other guidelines here), with one signed as a true photograph by a guarantor (someone who possess an Australian passport or is employed in specific fields, refer to Step 6 here.)

For further details, refer to this page on the Australian Consulate-General of Hong Kong’s website. You could also call them on 2827 8881 or email them at hkng.passports@dfat.gov.au for specific queries.

Canadian Passport

Is my child eligible for a Canadian passport?

Your child is likely a Canadian citizen if at least one parent was born in Canada, or became a naturalised Canadian citizen before the child was born. To find out for sure, check the process of applying for a citizenship certificate for your child. There have been some recent amendments to the Citizenship Act and further clarification can be found here. 

What is the application process?

Getting your baby’s Canadian passport is fairly easy in Hong Kong. Do remember that while the Consulate General of Canada in Hong Kong has moved to Exchange Square in Central, the Passport and Citizenship Services office has moved to Quarry Bay. Make sure you’re headed to the right spot! 

You’ll need to complete a passport application form, and also an application for Citizenship Certificate for your child. 

What do I need to bring to my appointment?

You’ll need to complete your passport application form and pay your fee online before booking an appointment to present your documents in person. If appointments are not available for the date required, applications can be mailed in or dropped off at the Consulate General of Canada in Hong Kong in Quarry Bay.

For in-person appointments, both parents must be present for the application process along with your child.

• A fully completed application form
• Two identical passport photos (50mm X 70mm); one must be signed by a Guarantor (the “Other” applying parent can be your Guarantor), plus the photographer must write their name, their complete address and the date the photos were taken. See the full photo requirements here.
• Original birth certificate
• Proof of Canadian citizenship or the receipt for the child’s citizenship application, original birth certificate or citizenship certificate.
• Original or certified photocopies of both parents’ valid government issue ID with signature
• Original or certified photocopies of the child’s valid passport of their other nationality (if applicable)
• Processing fee (CAN$100, approximately $550) to be paid by Visa or MasterCard (Canadian dollars), EPS, or cash order (HKD only)

Read through the Canadian Government website for the most updated requirements and suggestions for getting your child’s passport.

Read More: 8 Tips To Help Babies And Toddlers Overcome Jet Lag

French Passport

Is my child eligible for a French passport?

So long as at least one parent is a French national.

What is the application process?

Applying for a French passport in Hong Kong can sometimes be tricky. It requires original documents and a complete set of photocopies and the consulate is often very crowded. So go through these details carefully to make sure you have everything you need before making an appointment online.

Along with the passport, you must apply for a request for transcription of the birth certificate (to be completed by the French parent). While requesting transcription, it is necessary to indicate any accents to be worn on the child’s first name.

What do I need to bring to my appointment?

• Your baby. All passport applications require the physical presence of the applicant, though you needn’t bring your child (under 12 years old) while picking up the passport.
• 1 passport photo taken less than 6 months ago, refer to photo requirements here.
• A transcribed copy of your baby’s Hong Kong birth certificate.
• Proof of French nationality of at least one parent on the date of birth of the baby.
• Passports of both parents with photocopies
• A French marriage certificate. If you have a foreign marriage certificate, it is advisable to request a transcription from the French consulate.
• The parents’ family booklet with a photocopy of the marriage page (if you are married); otherwise a full copy of each parent’s birth certificate.
• A request for transcription of the birth certificate. You can download these forms here.

Read More: A French Mama Shares Her Secrets And Tips About French Parenting

Indian Passport

Is my child eligible for an Indian passport?

If either you or your spouse is an Indian citizen, then your child is eligible. Note that Indians are not allowed dual citizenship, so this will be the only passport you will apply for.

What is the application process?

If you are applying for an Indian passport for your newborn baby, you’ll have to first apply for the birth registration certificate online and declare that the child does not hold a passport from any other country.  Remember that passport and visa services have been outsourced to an external application centre, BLS. The application usually takes a month.

What do I need to bring to my appointment?

• An application form that has been filled in online and then printed out
• You must bring your baby
• An affidavit signed by both parents and attested by the Office of Oath Commissioner of Hong Kong/Macau.
• Both parents must be present or a single parent with passport of both. You must also produce an affidavit if you are a single parent or if the other parent is not available for certain reasons (mentioned under para II). If a parent is unable to obtain the consent from the other parent for obtaining the passport for the child, another affidavit must be submitted along with supporting documents.
• Original and self-attested photocopies of the first two and last pages of the parent(s)‘ passport(s).
• Original and self-attested photocopies of the HKIDs/valid visas of the parent(s).
• Three recent passport-size photographs (2 inch X 2 inch) with full face and ears visible and a white background
• Original and self-attested photocopy of the baby’s birth certificate
• Original and self-attested photocopy of the marriage certificate of parents.
• In case one of the parents is a foreign national, a certificate from the Embassy/Consulate of the foreign country stating that the child has not been registered as its citizen and not been issued a passport OR a signed affidavit by the parents, attested by the Office of Oath Commissioner of Hong Kong.
• An undertaking submitted by both parents declaring that they have not applied for foreign nationality for the baby.
• Fees of $632 (including passport and birth registration fees)

Refer to the BLS International page for more details about applying for an Indian passport for newborn babies.

Read More: Celebrating Hong Kong’s Diversity

British Passport

Is my child eligible for a British passport?

You will need to navigate through some tough language for this one. If either you or your partner is British “not by descent,” meaning that if you (or your partner) were able to obtain British citizenship either on your own or were born in Britain, then your child will be able to become a British citizen “by descent.” However, if you are a naturalised British citizen or a British citizen by descent yourself, this doesn’t apply to you. If this is unclear, go through this website, which pretty much puts everything in plain language.

What is the application process?

The good news is that the entire British passport process is completed online without the need for any appointments in person (except for interviews in special cases). The bad news is that it could take eight weeks plus, starting from the time that it is received by Her Majesty’s Passport Office in the UK. So be sure to plan your travel way ahead!

Editor’s Note: The Gov.UK online application service is unavailable at the time of publishing. Find out how to apply using other methods and supporting documents needed here.

What do I need to apply?

Since everything is conveniently done over the world wide web, you’ll only need a credit card. Some additional details to have on hand:

• Passport numbers of both parents
• Two digital identical new photos of your child (35mm x 45mm), see the requirements here. 

Sassy Mama Tip: Photos can now be taken digitally and there is no longer the necessity for the child’s eyes to be open (if they are under 1 year old). You can even take one at home with your baby lying down on a white sheet.

• A complete colour copy of any other current passports issued by other countries, plus additional supporting documents that you may need to provide.
• A MasterCard/Visa/Visa Electron/Visa Debit card to pay a total of GBP 72.86 online (approximately $696), which includes the passport and courier fees
• You will need to have your baby’s identity confirmed by someone who has known you at least two years, holds a UK passport and works for or is retired from certain professions.

Sassy Mama Tip: Though the website says the person confirming your baby’s identity needs to live in the UK, you can ignore this as, in this case, he or she needs to live in Hong Kong.

You need to enter all this into the online passport application service and wait patiently for the next eight weeks or so. The good news is that you will receive an email notification when they receive your documents, approve the passport and send it out to you. This reassures you that they haven’t forgotten about you!

For additional information, be sure to check out the overseas British passport application site.

Read More: How To Avoid Bringing Kids Up In An Expat Bubble In Hong Kong

American Passport

Is my child eligible for an American passport?

If either you or your partner are American citizens, then your child is able to receive a US passport too.

What is the application process?

When obtaining an American Passport you can also apply for a Consular Report of Birth Abroad (similar to a birth certificate) and a Social Security card at the same time. The U.S. Consulate in Hong Kong is where you’ll have to go for your appointment, which can be made online for business hours from Monday through Friday. Processing usually takes 20 days. Social Security cards arrive separately in 3 to 6 months. But first, here are some important items to bring and details to sort through:

Before you begin completing the Passport Form (DS-11 form) either online or by hand, your baby will also need a Consular Report of Birth Abroad. Ignore the part in the form where they tell you to mail it in as this will cause delays, and instead, bring them with you to the Consulate.

What do I need to bring to my appointment?

• Your baby! There are no exceptions to this policy.
• Both you and your spouse must be present, plus your original passports. Copies or ID cards are not acceptable.
• Or, your passport and a copy of the other parent’s passport, along with a notarised affidavit form of the other parent’s consent (Form DS-3053)
• Your child’s Hong Kong birth registration, see details here.  (Hospital birth certificates or other documents are not acceptable)
• A marriage certificate (must be original). If your baby was born out of wedlock or within six months of your marriage please check here for additional requirements.
• Proof of termination of any divorce or death certificates of any prior marriages (in English or translated yourself if not in English already).
• An affidavit showing all of your and your spouse’s periods and places of residence/physical presence in the United States and abroad before your baby’s birth. Here are some documents you could present to prove your physical presence in the US. If your child was conceived out of wedlock, additional evidence such as the biological parents’ physical presence at the time of conception may be required.
• Completed application forms for a Consular Report of Birth Abroad (Form DS-2029), US passport (DS-11) and Social Security Number (Form SS-5-FS).
• A US passport-sized photo of your baby (2 inches X 2 inches or 5cm X 5cm) on a white background. Please see here for photo requirements.
• USD100 for the Consular Report of Birth, USD115 for the passport. Total USD215 (approximately $1,667). Consulate accepts cash (HKD only), credit cards (USD only), cheque, bank draft or money order. If paying by cash please note that they don’t accept $1,000 bills or greater.
• You will need to show the original receipt to the guards to enter the Consulate to pick up your child’s new passport.

Sassy Mama Tip: The Consulate has both nursing and changing facilities which is helpful, but please do not bring any food, drinks or laptops. Also, note that phones will be left with security during your appointment.

Get these things in order and you’ll be ready to jet off with your bub and his/her new passport! Bon voyage, mama!

Read More: How To Travel With A Newborn Baby

Editor’s Note: How To Get A Passport For Your New Baby In Hong Kong was most recently updated in March 2023 by Najuka Redkar. 

The post How To Get A Passport For Your New Baby In Hong Kong appeared first on Sassy Mama.

Having a sibling to share the ups and downs in life is a gift that many of us want for our children. However, them forming a close bond is not always a given! But, as parents, there are ways we can try to prepare our first child or older children for the arrival of a younger sibling and help get their life-long relationship off to a good start. Here are some quick and easy tips that will help you prepare your older child(ren) and get ready yourself (and as a couple) to welcome your new member of the family.

Read more: 10 Things We Don’t Always Expect When We Are Expecting

1. Build a routine

When your newborn arrives, you will be no doubt be busy and less available both physically and emotionally, so really get to know your child now and give them your undivided attention. Slow down and try, on a daily basis, to discover one new feature or one little quirk that you have not noticed before. Take note of your child’s favourite book or cartoon character. Develop a couple of new rituals with your child (give it a name – special cuddle time or storytime with mummy). Those special moments (even 10 minutes a day) with your child will anchor them when the baby arrives, and go a long way towards helping them feel loved and secure. Remind your child often that those special times will remain the same after the baby arrives.

2. Understand your child (and your parenting style)

Use this time wisely, paying close attention to your child’s likes and dislikes. At the same time, reflect on your current parenting style, what works for you and what doesn’t. Remember that each parent’s and child’s dyad is different. Your newborn will not come with instructions but, as you have already learnt who you are as a parent from your existing child(ren), you know how your approach is working with them and are more aware of what might work with your new baby (knowing what provokes your hot buttons will help defuse many unnecessary struggles!).

Read more: Breast Pumps: Which One Is Right For You And Baby?

3. Meet your child’s needs (while setting boundaries)

There will be times after the new baby arrives that you will feel like a bad parent for neglecting your first-born (we all do sometimes!). You can start prepping your child now. Be clear and consistent about your boundaries and expectations. At the same time, be sensitive and attuned to your child’s needs (which, at times, are linked to their stage of development). This can help reduce the desire of your little one to push boundaries in exchange for attention (negative attention is still attention in the unconscious mind of a child).

Practice with your child now. The more prepared and flexible you are in focusing on the needs of your child, the more you will be able to help him or her accept the new arrival as a gift (and not an object stealing your love and affection).

4. Build a strong partnership

What you’re going to need most is a strong alliance to weather the storm (and sleepless nights) that lie ahead. You and your partner will teach and raise your children differently and it’s a good time to discuss your strengths and needs as parents while waiting for the second one’s arrival. This is not a time to blame, but a chance to repair your relationship and share your vulnerability as partners and parents. Start looking at what you have in common in terms of goals and expectations; you will be surprised at how much you have in common despite differences in your parenting styles.

Decide what is your non-negotiable expectation for your child. If table manners are important to you, it might be time to talk and work on a united front, deepening your relationship as parents. You need your partner to be on your side to help give your older child the extra attention they will need. This is a time when both your partner and your child are most vulnerable. Your partner needs your help to feel involved, needed and loved so he can provide the love and reassurance that your first-born needs. Do it now, before sleep deprivation takes over!

Read more: Totes In Style: Our Favourite Functional And Fashionable Diaper Bags

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We all know that pregnancies last for three trimesters, however, with a large majority of antenatal education focusing on your pregnancy and birth journeys, what is not often discussed is the postnatal period known as the “fourth trimester” and the impact it can have on both mum and baby. 

Once the wonder and intensity (and adrenaline!) of birth settles down, your new family enters the fourth trimester, which refers to roughly the first 12 weeks postpartum. During this time there are many changes, both physical and psychological, occurring for mum and baby. Understanding and anticipating these changes and their implications can help all members of the family navigate this special time.

Read more: How To Choose Baby Names And Avoid Disagreements

What’s in store for baby?

Having been comfortably nestled in your womb for nine months in a warm, dark, cosy and hunger-free home means that adjusting to life in an environment full of new experiences and stimuli can come as quite a shock to your newborn! As new mums, you will be well aware of the fact that you’re no longer pregnant, but your little one won’t have a clue as to what has just happened or why. It’s understandable that, with the significant adjustments and changes that have occurred, babies are likely to cry more during this 12-week period than at any other time in their lives. It’s important to know that you can never spoil your baby or give them too much physical touch and affection. As baby adjusts to its new normal, its ultimate source of security and comfort will be in the arms of family members – think plenty of skin to skin contact, cluster feeds, cuddles, walks around the block and lazy days spent together on the sofa. 

By the end of the fourth trimester, parents will have watched their little one go through a remarkable physical, mental and social transformation. After the first week or so, your baby will be gaining at least 20 to 30 grams of weight each day, feeding on-demand at least eight to ten times in a 24-hour period to meet their needs. Your newborn’s eyesight will also go from blurry to bright in the first few months. During week one, newborns can only see objects 8 to 12 inches from their face and they can’t yet see in colour. Bold black and white geometric prints and toys can provide great sources of stimulation in the early days and weeks as the baby’s vision is rapidly improving. By three months old, your baby will be able to recognise faces, track objects, study its own hands and feet, and maintain eye contact for longer periods of time. 

During the fourth trimester and beyond, it’s important that newborns begin to develop the important muscles associated with movements to lift their head in the upper back, neck, arms and shoulders. The way to facilitate this is by starting with plenty of “tummy time” as soon as you arrive home from the hospital. Placing your baby on their stomach on a comfortable, flat surface (always under a watchful eye) for a few minutes, several times a day can hugely aid their muscular development. However, your baby may not enjoy it too much at first! A few tips to help baby enjoy tummy time are getting down to its level to soothe them with your voice, massaging its feet and placing a mirror nearby so it can take a good look at its tummy time achievements!

Read more: Breastfeeding And Lactation Consultants In Hong Kong

What’s in store for mama?

Your baby won’t be the only one adjusting and adapting during the fourth trimester – mums get their fair share of this too! Your body experiences significant changes during pregnancy and the same can be said for after labour and delivery. While there’s a wealth of information and resources out there to educate us on pregnancy, labour and delivery, mum’s post-birth health and recovery can often get placed at the end of the priority list as your new baby’s needs take precedence. The practice of self-care in the postpartum period is more important than ever as, alongside the wonderful rush of oxytocin (also known as the love hormone) you receive, comes a notable decrease in your levels of estrogen and progesterone, which can contribute to the onset of the “baby blues”. Just remember that you’re not alone in your experiences! It’s okay to stay in your pjs all day, feel a little overwhelmed, take a nap or need a moment to yourself – these feelings are all completely normal. Be sure to allow yourself time for your mind, body and hormones to adjust to your new routine.

It will also take a few days and weeks for some of the physical changes to settle post-birth. During pregnancy, your uterus grew from the size of a small pear to more akin to a large watermelon, which then takes around six weeks to contract back down to pre-pregnancy size. This process is associated with mild bleeding, usually much less than a period, and light cramping sensations in the lower abdomen. Remember to regularly exercise your pelvic floor post-birth by doing pelvic floor (also known as Kegel) exercises a few times each day. Minimise the risk of back pain, shoulder discomfort and repetitive strain injuries by ensuring you are comfortable and well supported whilst feeding and holding your baby.

Read more: Where To Buy Nursing Bras In Hong Kong

The first few weeks with your newborn may feel somewhat like a whirlwind of highs, lows and everything in between! Make sure to only set yourself modest and realistic goals for the day and to prioritise your recovery alongside caring for your new little bundle. Your baby will give you its first smile at around four to six weeks – that will be the most wonderful reward for all your hard work during the fourth trimester, and beyond! 

The post The Fourth Trimester: What To Expect When You’re No Longer Expecting appeared first on Sassy Mama.

Rushing the process of getting pregnant, giving birth or early breastfeeding helps no one. In fact, it sometimes gets in the way of things happening or at least makes them less enjoyable. Certainly one of the above is better when done slowly.

This also extends to the days after the baby is born – what we choose to call the ‘fourth trimester’. Research shows us that the development of the baby, bonding between parents and the baby, the success of breastfeeding and good sleep patterns has much to do with how patient and perceptive one is to all the things that are happening in a new baby’s life.

Life outside the womb

First, we need to understand how difficult it is for our newborns to adapt to life outside the womb, a place they have rested in for nine months, a place which offers peace and slow-motion rocking, soothing voices and tones that our little babies will soon learn to recognise. Now, they are opening their eyes, ears, skin, nose and all sensory systems to new and quite strong stimulation. Babies also have to adapt to a new, albeit instinctive way of feeding and sleeping, and sometimes are asked to fit that pattern around others, rather than relying on what their own little bodies are trying to communicate.

We do know, through research, that newborns respond and recognise their parents’ voices and tones, and certain things are familiar to them already. However, imagine all the stimulation that suddenly pours into the life of the newborns, immediately in the hospital in the first hour of life: strong lights shining straight onto their faces, many new individuals that all have loud voices and new smells, the smell of the room and cleaning products that are used at the time of the birth, the suctioning of the fluid that fills their lungs at the time of birth, a tube that goes all the way down the throat, the soap from bathing… the list goes on and on.

These are all quite new, and oftentimes jarring, experiences for a newborn, and we as new parents don’t realise enough how difficult it is for our little bubs who are just being introduced to the world.

Enjoy these very few weeks you have with your newborn

In the fourth trimester – the first weeks after the baby is born and is at home with you – there are many things you can do to make the transition easier and less stressful for both you and the baby and the family as a whole. Always keep in mind that the baby is adjusting and learning and finding its own feet and for the time being, the parents are its link to being able to do so. The baby relies on you 100 percent and tries to message you in the best way it possibly can. If you ignore or rush too much through those signals, or perhaps follow advice from others who are maybe not in the same situation, it may well result in a stressful situation, more cries from the baby and a delayed bonding between the two of you.

Here are some examples of how you can make the fourth trimester more enjoyable:

1. Keep your baby in your arms or use a sling. Basically, a newborn relaxes well with its parents, hearing their heartbeat, finding warmth from their skin and listening to the tone of their voices. Of course, the baby can also sleep in its own cot, but in-between times, or if the baby is crying, this is a very easy way to soothe.
2. Skin-to-skin contact helps to regulate breathing, temperature and feeding and is stimulating in a relaxing way for babies. For this reason, it is suggested that immediately after birth, the baby has the chance to lie directly on the mother’s or father’s skin with no blankets between. This can continue for months after birth, if both enjoy it.
3. Feed on demand. This is the soundest advice that anyone gave me about breastfeeding. Why on earth would you want to deny a newborn baby food if it is hungry, or feed a newborn with a tiny stomach, if he is not hungry? It just does not make sense and until the baby is older and can signal easier and you understand the signals better, it’s best to let the baby lead the way.
4. Some babies sleep very well in their own cot. Some, however, seem not be able to find deep sleep there and if you co-sleep safely, you may well find a much more relaxed baby, and mother. Less crying, shorter feeds and everyone wakes up better rested.
5. Regular walks under the bare sky, with nature sounds and the movement of your own body relaxing the baby. This is a great way for both of you to get fresh air and new space for yourselves and often this soothes the baby that otherwise has a hard time settling inside the flat.
6. Singing or nursery rhymes very quickly become familiar to the newborn and can be a good way to create a routine and relaxed atmosphere in the bedroom when the little one is tired. Singing nursery rhymes stimulates language development and will have long-term positive effects.
7. Create little routines or habits that both you and baby learn to understand and get used to. Try and include everyone in the family in some of the routines, for example the time the baby sleeps and wakes up, so that he can see both parents in the morning and evening. This may be easy or difficult, but if you can control this, it is pleasant for everyone.
8. Enjoy the tasks and chores rather than looking at them as duties. The bath for example, can happen every day and take a long time. Or it can happen less often, if it is stressful. Take your time, fill the tub well and just let the baby slowly float around in the water while you support him, as long as he is relaxed.

When older people are asked what they most regret in life, or how they would do things differently if they had the chance, many answer that they wish they gave themselves more time to do things with their children! Why not start from an early age and create a positive environment for your bub as soon as they’re born? With these simple changes, you can make the fourth trimester as enjoyable as possible for both parents and the baby.

You’ve got this, mama!

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A baby neither makes nor breaks a marriage; a baby can, however, highlight the weaknesses and strengths of a marriage and will inevitably change it. How a couple chooses to respond to this change can set the tone for years to come — for better or worse, in sickness and in health.

What changes after the baby arrives

Labour arrives and so too does the baby. The initial moments and months can be an intoxicating, maddening mixture of delight and frustration. Who is this soul, and how do we care for him/her? How do we care for ourselves? And, what happens to the marriage?

There are inherent struggles of caring for a baby and one’s marriage simultaneously. Couples often find the initial period of caring for the baby to be the most stressful as the baby requires so much attention and energy. A baby’s needs must be met, and these needs are often put ahead of the couple’s. As the baby grows, the demands will shift as a (flexible) routine sets in, which means a couple may notice new opportunities to spend together. At any age, though, maintaining a healthy marriage requires creative work.

Some tips for a having a healthy marriage pre and post baby

Discussing how to share the responsibilities related to caring for a baby typically is not the sexiest discussion you’ll have, but it’s one that needs to be done.

• Set your expectations realistically by doing your research efficiently — you do not need to spend ten hours researching the best crib to buy. Use your time trying to understand the realities and responsibilities of carrying and taking care of a baby. Can you still have sex during your pregnancy? What about exercise? Do you know how many times, on average, a newborn will wake at night? Poops in 24 hours? Once you have done the research, it’s time for a flexible plan for both the baby and marriage.
• Voice your concerns early, and be proactive about them. Speak with your partner about any anxieties, fears, and/or concerns you have, and try to be proactive about them together. For example, if you are anxious about not knowing what to expect, then try doing something together about it such as taking an antenatal class.
• Decide which “gifts” you can give without being resentful. Can you really get up seven nights in a row and not resent your partner for sleeping peacefully in a separate room? If you can’t, then don’t do it (unless absolutely necessary). Would you be willing to let your partner go for a run on a Sunday for two hours if he/she watches the baby for a couple of hours later in the afternoon?
• Communicate! This is often an overlooked thing in marriages. None of us are mind readers to the point of always knowing what another human being wants or needs so ask. Questions such as “How have you been feeling lately?”, “What’s been working for you and what hasn’t while caring for the baby?”, “How are you feeling about us?” and “How can we work together to help problem solve?” can go a long way in making your partner feel supported and understood.
• Be kind. Those sleep-deprived months following the birth can be dizzying… torturing, really. Being kind in those moments isn’t usually easy, but try to think before you say something you may regret. A relationship in which you can express your thoughts and feelings is not an invitation for hurting or manipulating your partner, sleep deprived or not.
• Learn to speak your own language. Some couples like to set date nights, whereas others go with the flow of the week. Try not to compare too much with what other couples do.

Read more: Hong Kong Dining: Date Night Spots for Mamas and Papas

Finally, become curious. Baby or not, the world is full of delights and frustrations. Choose to stay curious about the experience you’re having individually as a mother/father and collectively as a couple. Find your own rhythm as a couple, and speak that unique language – even if, once in awhile, that language comes out sounding like goo goo gaga. 

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2016 is expected to be a big year for babies in Hong Kong! For some of us who are adding a new little one, we might already have a baby (of the furry variety) living at home – and they can be even more finicky than older siblings.

Please welcome dog trainer Michelle Chan with some timely expert advice on bringing a new baby home to your pet and helping everyone get along.

There are many similarities between raising a puppy and raising a baby, but they each bring such a unique brand of joy to a family (and to each other!). First impressions count and we can certainly take some key steps to help the relationship between your beloved pet and your new baby blossom:

1. Practise good manners

Before the baby arrives, practise basic manners with your dog so that he knows them well and can do them easily when told. Behaviours like “sit” and “stay” are essential so that you can easily control your dog when you are carrying the baby, keeping baby out of harm’s way. Once the baby arrives, you will have your hands full (literally!) and the last thing you want is to push off 30 kilos of dog jumping up onto you trying to sniff the baby!

2. Listen to babytalk

Play a CD of baby noises during the dog’s meal times to introduce these new sounds in a positive manner to the dog prior to the baby’s arrival. Many dogs, particular those sensitive to loud noises, form a negative association between the crying and the baby, causing them to avoid the child. Helping the dog learn to love the sounds before the baby arrives will help the dog accept the baby’s presence better.

3. Let Fido sniff out his new friend

Many mums ask if they should have dad bring home a blanket with the baby’s scent on it.  You can certainly do so and let the dog become accustomed to the scent in positive ways, just like you would with baby noises. Helping the dog create positive associations with things about the baby beforehand can help nurture positive feelings for the baby when they do finally meet.

4. A civilised introduction

When mum and baby have returned home and get settled down (there is no need to rush to have the dog and baby meet!), sit on the sofa with baby in your arms and invite the dog over to check out his new family member. Here’s where you can put that manners training to good use – all four paws should be on the ground! No jumping up at baby, and no getting next to you on the sofa (so as to protect the little one’s face). There is no need for the dog to do an all over check of the baby – just investigating the tiny feet will do!

5. Dogs need a “happy place”, too

Set up different “success stations” for the dog so that it can be included in everyday activities safely or be allowed some quiet time to relax on his own away from the hustle and bustle of family life. Tethering the dog on a leash near you allows the dog to observe the baby and yet stay out of the way, while a crate or fence offers the dog a break from the stressful noise and activity where he can enjoy a toy stuffed with food or doggy chew in peace instead.

Thanks Michelle! Here’s to lots of giggles and waggly tails, mamas!

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